The 5 sure signs that it’s time to see a therapist
There are many signs that can be present that would lead a widow to believe that she needs to seek therapy from a professional. Considering these signs, I would always encourage a widow to seek therapy soon after the death of their partner.
In the beginning you may feel like you’re handling things well and feel like therapy may be too overwhelming. I would seek therapy anyway even if it is only to check in monthly and build a trusting relationship with a therapist. I say this because at some point the shock WILL wear off and the bottom WILL drop and having a developing therapeutic relationship will be a lifesaver.
All that being said, LOOK FOR THESE SURE SIGNS THAT YOU NEED HELP:
1. If you have any feelings of wanting to harm yourself or someone else, you need to seek help immediately by calling a loved one or suicide hotline (1-800-273-8255). This one is obvious, but sometimes we are so far into our grief that we just can’t see any way out of it.
2. Feelings of being out of control. If you have tried to do things to better yourself or help the depression or relieve the anxiety, but NOTHING is working. Then it’s a sign you need some extra help.
3. Your emotions are preventing you from doing everyday tasks. Whether at home or school or work or anywhere really, are you having significant difficulty doing regular activities? Maybe you can’t concentrate. Or maybe it’s that everything overwhelms you. Or you’ve been avoiding co-workers or friends. If this behavior continues for weeks, it’s time to get help.
4. Volatile emotions, mood swings, abuse of substances. If you are trying to control your mood swings with things such as alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, even food or gambling. Self-medicating is NOT the answer.
5. Unhealthy expressions of emotions. Especially if we turn the anger to loved ones or someone else in our lives. Making someone else feel bad is not going to make you feel better in the end.
Please keep in mind that this is based on my experience as a widow and a therapist. You need to assess your own situation and what is best for you. Also, you may not have horribly intense feelings and still want to reach out for help.
Many people feel relief from simply talking to someone that can be objective and nonjudgmental. Talk therapy can do wonders for some, whereas others may respond better to different forms of therapy. Just remember that everyone’s story is unique and there is no right or wrong, just different.
~ Christine Dusang
