11 Reasons Why It’s Better To Date A Widow!
I want to start this off by saying that every widow hates the word “widow”.
It’s not a badge we proudly wear. It’s not a category we’ve ever wanted to fall under. We did not choose that unfortunate label. Life handed us what it did and we were left to pick up the broken bits of our existence and figure out what to do with them.
So, when a widow decides, after time and healing and patching together the tiny pieces of her broken heart, that she is finally ready to put herself out there again to start dating, that “widow” word comes back to bite her.
The “widow” word implies too much baggage.
The “widow” word implies too much drama.
The “widow” word implies a life of eternal sadness.
The “widow” word implies someone that needs to be rescued.
Wrong.
To all of the men who are questioning whether or not to date a widow, I want you to know this: She’s worth it.
I could go on and on, but here are a handful of reasons why it’s better to date a widow.
1. You don’t have to worry about saving her. She has saved herself over and over repeatedly in the time she’s spent grieving. She doesn’t need a rescuer. She’s fully capable of pulling herself up and dusting herself off, as she’s done it countless times before. If she has a problem, she figures out the solution because she’s scrappy as hell. She is steady. She is solid. She’s not a complainer. She’s an action-taker. She will get shit done.
2. She understands the importance of the preciousness of life in a uniquely profound way. She knows that the meaning of life is passion and purpose. She knows that life is a gift to be cherished. She will hold on tightly to your hand and walk with you on this journey through life. She will be your partner in crime. She will be your best friend and more.
3. She doesn’t need you for any other reason than to enjoy you and the pleasure of your company. Your presence in her life is not necessary, it’s because she prefers to be with you. She doesn’t rely on you to make her feel complete. She doesn’t rely on you to make her feel secure. She doesn’t rely on you to make her feel ANYTHING. She knows she is responsible for her own feelings and happiness. She carefully and purposely chose YOU to be in her life. She chose you to co-write the next chapter of her story.
4. She loves fiercely with a depth that others don’t always understand. She will invite your love in because she knows that love expands the heart, it doesn’t push other love out of the way. It adds to the love that’s already there. She knows that love persists and love expands. An overabundance of love is her goal and priority. She understands the value of deep relationships with others. She values the quality of those connections to the people around her.
5. She is braver than any other woman you will ever meet. She’s a fighter. She is a pillar of emotional strength that you can lean on when you need her. She’s been through the worst pain a human being can bear. She’s been through the worst loss that you can imagine and she’s still standing. She has faced the unknown with incomparable courage. She forges her way through the world with determination, grit, AND grace. Grief has changed her down to her very core and she has taken the lessons she’s learned from it and used adversity as a springboard to move her forward. She has been handed the shittiest of deals and has chosen to rise above it.
6. She doesn’t sweat the small stuff. She doesn’t put her energy into pettiness. She knows to let it go. Patience is one of her superpowers. Arguing is wasted breath. Arguing is wasted time. She’s better than that. She has been liberated from the minutiae.
7. She appreciates any and all gestures of your kindness and acts of love, even the tiny ones, because she is so used to having to do all of it on her own. She will greatly appreciate the next man that steps into her life and offers help. Help with the kid’s homework. Fix the leaky sink. Put air in her tires. It doesn’t matter how small of a gesture, if you’re taking it off her plate, off of the “to-do” list, her eyes will sparkle with appreciation for you!
8. She lives her life with a raw authenticity that is enviable by most. She’s an open book. Communication is her strong suit. Important things don’t go unsaid. She will share her feelings, her fears, her heart, openly, willingly, and without reservation. She won’t pretend to have her shit together all the time, but that’s what makes her so lovable!
9. She is much more self-aware than the average woman. She walks through life with a keen awareness and deep compassion for all. She is careful with her words because she’s had too many wrong ones said to her in the past.
10. She is grateful for everything that she’s had in the past AND what she has now in the present. Gratitude has helped her heal and she leans on that to get her through rough days. Gratitude is reflected in her spirit, in her soul, and in everything she does. Gratitude keeps her grounded. It keeps her mind focused, not on the past or future, but savoring the present moment with the person she’s with now…YOU!
11. She has a zest for life that you will have to keep up with! Her enthusiasm is contagious. She is the most vividly alive person you know. She knows that life is short and that you need to take advantage of every single moment you have on this Earth. Adventure? Yes, please! She has an insatiable appetite for living life to the fullest. She’s invested in living a bold, grand life and would love nothing more than to have a partner to enjoy it with!
I wrote this blog post because I know that so many of you really need to read this and let it sink in. You need to know how truly amazing you are.
You need to be reminded of your importance and your worth.
Because when we lose our spouse, we can start to lose our confidence in ourselves too. We no longer have that partner, that person to compliment us, to remind us how special we are.
So, this is ME reminding YOU that YOU are valuable and special and beautiful.
And if finding love again is something on your heart, you’re worth it!
If you’re struggling with the whole idea of dating again and finding it to be, well, overwhelming, I want to help!
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